Change Someone’s Life by Remembering Your WHY
EGO doesn’t change lives. What will change someone’s life is the courage to do what is difficult. And that is remembering and living your why.
Being self-confident makes you happier and more successful, but hey, those are not the right reasons to try to be more confident.
If you have low self-confidence, or almost none at all, and you are happy with it, just let it be. If instead, you want to increase your self-confidence, this little article will give you some suggestions on how to do it.
Let´s start with courage, however.
Courage can be defined as “the deliberate choice during fearful circumstances to act for the sake of a worthy goal”.
That worthy goal might for instance be a task, a bigger project, or even becoming who you want to be.
It may mean that you act with integrity according to your values, no matter what others think of you, even if your actions might expose you to negative reactions from others.
Self-confidence can be defined as having trust in yourself and your abilities, as well as the realistic belief that you will be able to do what you wish and plan for, even if you do not yet possess the right skills.
Self-confidence, courage, and fear are linked together. If your fear is high and your self-confidence is low, you will probably not act according to your values or achieve what you want in life.
If on the other hand your fear is inappropriately low for the given situation and your self-confidence is high, you will probably end up being foolhardy.
To be courageous in a way that makes you grow as a person, fear and self-confidence need to balance each other out.
By exposing yourself to unknown situations where you learn more about yourself, you will increase your self-confidence and be freer to live your life the way you want to – if that is what you want, of course.
Some are happy doing things as they have always done them and others want to step out of their comfort zone to grow.
Just remember to stay respectful of who you are.
Having said that, increased self-confidence leads to a greater sense of self-worth, more happiness and enjoyment, freedom from self-doubt, increased strength and capabilities, freedom from fear and anxiety – even social anxiety – more peace of mind, energy and motivation, less stress, better sleep and health, and greater success.
As a morning routine, talk to yourself with a kind inner voice: Start the morning by looking at yourself in the mirror and pretending you are your best friend.
What do you wish would happen today for this beloved person you have in front of you?
It might be several things. Choose the one that is the most appealing to you, look yourself in the eyes, and say it out loud.
As an evening routine, give yourself five: Write down five things that you have successfully done today.
With ”successfully” I mean things that help you become who you want to be or to achieve your goals.
Perhaps you made a good decision, did some exercise, or finally cleaned up that mess so you can get going with what you really want to do.
Write down whatever you feel proud of or are happy to have achieved that day.
Create a golden treasure library of good thoughts, quotations, or things that people you value have said or written about you.
You can even contact them (by e-mail, phone, text, Messenger, etc.) and ask them to tell you what they appreciate about you.
Keep this library with quotes in a safe place and read it when you are feeling down and/or as a continuous, uplifting routine, for instance, once a week.
Remember to save new quotes in your golden treasure library!
Memento mori: Remember that you must die. It might sound negative to think about death, but life and death are closely linked to each other, and being close to death means being close to life.
Once a month, ask yourself the following questions: do I live my life the way I want to?
If I died tomorrow, would I feel satisfied with the life I have lived? Is there anything that I wish I would have done or done more or less of? Is there anything I regret?
It might be useful to walk around in a graveyard, to physically witness that life will end one day, while doing this exercise.
If you have friends or relatives who are in the hospital, visiting them might also help you reflect on what is important in life.
Make a list of what you want to change. Then go ahead and make those changes! And remember to be grateful for everything that you have got in your life right now.
As a suggestion, you can also write a ”gratitude list”. Remember to also write down small, but very vital things, like for instance having the ability to breathe.
Working on yourself can be scary, overwhelming, confusing, messy, challenging, and lonely. On this podcast, hosted by Jellis Vaes, an aspiring clinical psychologist who once battled severe emotional struggles, you’ll gain valuable insights from experts in psychology, neuroscience, and relationships, as well as people like you and me, to support you on your mental health journey, help you feel less alone, and untangle some of the complexity of mental health.
For more support, visit Inner Path Seekers.
Show notes can be found here:https://theipsproject.com/2026/04/reason-we-stay-addicted-kevin-cornelius/
Addiction is complex, deeply human, and often misunderstood.
In this episode, we take a grounded and practical look at what addiction really is and how it can be treated effectively.
I’m joined by Kevin Cornelius, a licensed marriage and family therapist and clinical director at the Feeling Good Institute Silicon Valley.
Kevin specializes in TEAM-CBT, a powerful and evolving therapeutic approach developed by psychiatrist David Burns.
What I am hoping you get out of this episode, besides learning some of the reasons why people stay addicted, is that you will learn some practical techniques to start taking a small step toward freeing yourself from whichever addiction you might be struggling with.
If, after this episode, you’d like to learn more about the effects addiction has on the brain, do have a listen to the episode I did with Dr. Grisel, titled The Brain on Addiction.
📚The IPS Academy📚
If you feel that you’ve gained some insights and lessons from this video, and you are curious to see what else we offer at The IPS Project, check out The IPS Academy, where we offer online courses taught by guests here on the podcast.
Simply go to https://theipsproject.com/academy. Each course has a few lessons to try for free, so you get a taste of what the course is like. We have countless reviews from other students so you can see what others think, and there is a 30-day money-back guarantee if you end up not liking the course.
Again, check them out at https://theipsproject.com/academy
EGO doesn’t change lives. What will change someone’s life is the courage to do what is difficult. And that is remembering and living your why.
Signe M. Hegestand, a psychologist, talks about how to start healing from emotional abuse and the signs and symptoms of emotional abuse.
Derek Sivers, author, TED speaker, and critical thinker, talks in this episode about challenging beliefs, embracing your weirdness, and confronting death.